Residual Check

Residual checks always perk me up. They're sort of a mystical concept. You never know when they'll appear nor how how much they'll be. And I, at least, have no earthly clue what sort of algebraic gymnastics the Screen Actors Guild goes through to determine what ends up in our bank account.

Today, when I found a residual check nestled amongst the bills, it was like Christmas in March.

Then, once again, I had that nagging thought that I should be more diligent in understanding the byzantine world of residual pay, but to be honest, I got a turkey to cook (guests tonight), beds to make and dogs to de-worm. Who has the time?

Luckily, it doesn't have to be a lot of money to make me happy. Just enough for a jumbo-sized bottle of Ketel One and I'm grinning like Carol Channing off her meds. Well today was a red letter day. Seventeen payments were added together in a single check. I can practically taste that martini.

Foreign Royalty Statements are always a hoot because you get to see which of our shows are watched overseas. ER, Ally McBeal and Monk make sense. They are/were all blue chip shows. But Switzerland really follows Yes, Dear? And Strong Medicine is big in Spain? I'm pretty sure the only episodes I saw of either of those clunkers were the ones featuring my husband.

But thoughts of Michael as Detective Paul Armstrong on Strong Medicine subside as I imagine sparkling bottles of top shelf vodka lining my liquor cabinet/ironing board closet.

Then I take a closer look...

Fifteen dollars and sixty-two cents! Seventeen showings and all we get is fifteen dollars and sixty-two cents!! (The episode of Monk paid the most, while Strong Medicine paid out a penny an episode. Told you it was a crappy show.) So much for Ketel One. I'll be lucky if I can buy a bag of Funions and a six pack of Bud.