Perez Hilton: Vermont recently became the forth state to legalize same sex marriage. Do you think every state should follow suit? Why or why not? (A tricky question, a basket of asps Obama doesn't like to touch, but still she might be able to finesse an articulate response. Mightn't she? She is a resident of left-leaning California after all.)
Carrie Prejean, Miss California: Well, I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. (Confuse me, when was this choice made available?) Um, we live in a land that you can choose same sex marriage or opposite marriage. (The dreaded opposite marriage.) And, you know what, in my country (Huh?) and in (She does a slight Porky Pig stutter. Find your thought. Find it.) in my family I think that I believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman. (And "I think that I believe that" you found your thought.) No offense to anyone out there. (Great offence to how you're butchering the English language.) But that's how I was raised and that's how I think that it should be, between a man and a woman. Thank you. (Amen. God Bless America. Give that woman a baby to kiss and an assault weapon to autograph.)
Later on Fox News she said:
"This happened for a reason. By having to answer that question in front of a national audience, God was testing my character and faith. I'm glad I stayed true to myself."
Then we spiral out of control. The blogista Perez Hilton calls Missy C a dumb bitch, then apologizes, then recants the apology, then calls her a B again and to drive his point home, he calls her a C (not a Californian) and all on national TV. Carrie Prejean takes a different tact. On TV she says she feels sorry for Perez, says she will pray for him, and goes on to expound that she was only sharing her opinion.
Okay, then, my opinion... Perez, dude, you went way over the top. I'm all for the cause, but she's like eighteen or something, a child basically, and you're the one doing the name calling.
And Carrie, my inarticulate beauty, you're right to have your opinions. But you must realize that what you believe, or what I believe for that matter, should not have any bearing on our Supreme Court's decision. This is a civil rights issue, not a religious one. The Bible or the Torah or the Qur'an or Watership Down or Frankenstein or Goodnight Moon cannot be a part of this argument. We're talking equal rights, not beliefs. Because the God you so revere, who tells you gay marriage is wrong and opposite marriage is right, conflicts with the God who sanctified my husband's and my marriage in His church. Religion has to stay out of the final argument.
Now consider the following: "All marriages of white persons with negroes or mulattoes [shall be] declared to be illegal and void." This was put into our state's law in 1850. It was written by those who had strong opinions. Those who let their personal discomfort rule over protecting Californian's civil rights. In 2009, banning interracial marriage seems ludicrous. However, this law was in effect for almost one hundred years. It wasn't overturned until 1948.
Yes. Opinions. Opinions can hurt. Opinions have power. Opinions can splinter and distance. As you go further into adulthood, I hope you will become more diplomatic and take other's opinions into account, as well as your own. Mr. Hilton was wrong with his name calling, but his volcanic anger was justified. By staying true to yourself, your answer was a big fat loogie in the face of many of your fans. Perez is still wiping it off, believe me. Now, I did not attend the event, but there is no way you looked as beautiful as you did without a gaggle of gay men working you head to toe. Likewise, think of the lesbians who helped hang the lights, build the stage, make the extra trips to Home Depot. You spurned the very brothers and sisters who helped to make your night almost a complete success, Miss First Runner Up.
And I realize this is not totally your fault. You have been conditioned by your community, your family, your church, but now it's time now to open your eyes. Learn to be judicious, because next time you speak with complete disregard I will not be able to defend you with the youth card. And maybe when you're getting your tan sprayed on, or when your Christian boobs are being glued into your dress, or as you saunter center stage in your evening gown, someone you disrespected might just have a bucket of pig's blood handy. And darling, red is not your color.