Bad Routine

Looking back, I think it's a bad routine.

Both our kids have the annoying habit of waking up a smidge after sunrise. Doesn't matter what time they went to bed or how blacked out their curtains are, at five forty-six they're wide awake demanding attention.

At one and a half, Sebastian would climb out of his crib and come into our room. Michael and I would invite him into our California king where he'd refall asleep, allowing us to catch that forty-first and perhaps even forty-second wink.

After a while, Bash needed a sippy cup to get back to sleep. I revised the routine. We added a beverage center (fancy schmancy terminology meaning small fridge) in the island when we redid our kitchen. Instead of coming directly to our bedroom, I taught my son to go to the beverage center, where his sippy cup would be waiting, filled with PediaSure the night before, and then come to our bedroom, slurp himself silly, and fall back asleep between the snugly warmth of his two daddies.

And it was cute until Bash started growing and kicking. And when my daughter came into the picture, forgetaboutit! Sometimes toys are brought with them. Sometimes they come as a pair. More often than not, I am kicked out. Of my own bed! Where I was spinning happy dreams about being twenty-three again and becoming an acclaimed disco dancer.

This doesn't happen every morning, however, this morning, yes. Banished from the boudoir. Deported from the duvet. Exiled from the Enchanted Kingdom. Relegated to a couch or forced to start the breakfast no one will eat.

I used to be a morning person. I'd pop out of bed at six, get myself to the subway, find myself a corner seat, fall back asleep and miraculously get out at Columbus Circle, never sleeping through my stop. Then I would walk the couple of blocks to John Jay College, which emphasized criminal justice, passed display cases of confiscated shivs made by prison inmates from old tooth brushes, and headed into the bowels of the building where I swam. I belonged to a Masters swim team. I DID LAPS. In New York! I trained three to four times a week, and competed at swim meets.

This would probably be a good place to mention in regards to sports, I embarrassingly fit the stereotype. I could not do ball sports (pun intended) to save my life. I could not hit, catch, or go out for the long pass. Swimming was survival. I held my head up high because I had a dolphin kick that could eviscerate and could hold my breath longer than Houdini.

But no longer. Once we moved to Los Angeles, the land of the swimming pool, I haven't said boo to racing. And the more out of shape I get, the more I'm secure that this body shouldn't don a Speedo. I blame my husband. Because of his schedule the only time I get to spend with him are the wee hours. We go to bed at one, maybe two every night. There is no way in Hades that I'm going to set an alarm for five fifty to get out of the house by six for an early swim. This mommy needs her sleep...

...Which invariably gets interrupted anyway. I imagine at some age my kids will not want to come into our bed. This is both what I long for and yet it saddens me. Maybe it's best to focus on the now., I've created a nice dent in our couch that fits my body perfectly.


My kids are annoyingly early risers, too. And I've gotta say - I found it disheartening when you mentioned that it doesn't matter how blacked-out their windows are ... because all this time I've been blaming my boys' crack-of-dawn wakeups on the sun coming in through their (pitifully inadequate) blinds. You mean to tell me that if I purchase the heavy curtains I've been lusting after, it's not going to make any difference?

Meeko Fabulous said…
I totally understand what it's like with the weird work hours of my BF too. I stay up way past the normal time any human should be awake and then I get up early for work and when I get home, I nap. LOL
~Just me again~ said…
I went through that with my younger one. Take comfort in knowing that they will out grow that. And eventually, they will wake you up even earlier in the morning, when they come stolling in after a party.

I know, but I wanted you to know that that won't last forever ;)
Yankee Girl said…
This is the only thing that worries me about having kids. I know I'll be a good mom, I know we can afford it, midnight feedings and 2am and 4am feedings don't scare me because I know I can go back to sleep. But having to wake up and be ready to start the day with a smile on my face at 6am? I don't know if I can do it. I know I will someday, so right now I am trying like hell to get as much sleep as possible.
Shana said…
My daughter was 6 or 7 before she stopped doing that.
Now she hates getting up in the morning.
You're right; my daughter always wound up in my bed during thunderstorms. Now it's been over 2 years and I miss it...
Though I do sleep better.

I swim too. It will still be there when your kids are a little older; don't be too tough on yourself.
Frau said…
Soon they will grow out of it and your pay back will be when they are teens!
Humor me girl said…
I just happened on your blog and love it already. My daughter always seem to crawl into our bed too, and with a King size I swear she crawls so softly and quietly that she been there for 3 hours before I even realize it. Don't worry, before you know it you will be crawling in her bed for that cuddling you miss so much.
Kelli said…
I feel your pain! My kids are the exact same way. And without fail, the days we cannot sleep in, they do. But the days that I desperately want to sleep in till just 8 or 8:30... they are up and awake. It's so not cool. But I too know that they will hit that stage where it will be an effort to get them out of bed! Just know that you are not alone!
Amy said…
Maybe...most likely, I'll someday miss the rumpled little head bobbing by my bedside at 2 a.m. searching out the best spot in which to crawl over mommy and insert herself into my cozy world of slumber. I'm sure I'll miss the ten little toes worming their way under my side, too.

Sometimes, depending on the level of 4 year old thrashing going on, I wander into her bedroom and throw myself onto her shabby chic twin-sized bed and drift off as her princess night light glows at the foot of the bed.

All good mommies are willing to relocate.
C said…
hahahah i so remember when my kids would do that, now i miss it terribly. they are just too big to climb in with me now!
[ages 17, 18, 22, 25] heehee

cherish the moments honey because they too shall pass. you will one day look back on these tired mornings as the best years of your lives. seriously.

i love your blog!

savante said…
At least you can swim! I have zero hand-to-eye coordination.
The Good Cook said…
WAIT! One day your littles will be middles (teenagers) and you will have to scream them out of bed at 3:00 pm. Such annoying creatures these things we call children!
trashalou said…
aphypenSnap with the ungodly o'clock wake-ups. It gets easier as they get older I promise.

Suggest you set a time limit as they become more independent. In my house it was seven a.m. On several occasions we had the talk that goes 'Mummy does not start working until that clock by your bed starts with a seven. Shall we go and draw a seven together so you can remember it?' That gap between being small enough to snuggle in bed and go back to sleep after milk/juice and being able to read quietly in bed can be tough. Hang in there.
Oh man. I'd die if my kids woke up that early. I like my sleep. I think I traumatized my kids when they did wake up early so much that now they know that they must entertain themselves until at least 8.
natalee said…
LOL!!! you are too funny i almost peed myself about the ball sport pun.. love it!!!!
The never ending balance of wanting your kids to be more independent and at the same time stay young.
You're right. Try to enjoy the now, and hope you'll be able to shed the sticky goo that has formed around all your muscles.
My youngest is off to Kindergarten this fall and part of me wants to do a victory dance and the other part of me is weeping.
Bring Back Pluto
Gloria said…
This is my first visit to your blog and I'm loving it. So insightful, so funny and so real. Bought back lots of memories of yesteryear but blogs weren't around then . . and computers were comparitively new in the 70's and early 80's. Loving every word!!!
natalee said…
Lol.. You are soo funny.. I love the banished from funny...i love your blog sooo soooo much!!!!
Anonymous said…
Ah, I can relate! "Is it wake-up time yet?" is how my day usually starts around 6am...
surprised mom said…
I remember those days when the girls were little and would wake up early to catch a snuggle with mom and day. At 18 and 15, they don't do that any more. It is sad when they grow older, sometimes.
My two girls are NOT morning people as they were when they were younger. It's very, very hard to get them up, never mind them getting up with or before the sun rises. That's always fun.
Why is it that children and spouses schedules often mean leaving expercise or sports behind. It's a phenomena I've witnessed over and over again. Not only do I not wear a Speedo (yes, they have them for women), I haven't donned a bathing suit in some time.
It's ironic that you live in the land of swimming pools and can't find the time to use one. I was never much of a sports enthusiast or player. I can barely walk and chew gum at the same time.
BTW, sorry I'm responding so late, but, somehow, I missed this post. Shame on me.
S3XinthePantry said…
Yes, the morning snuggle time and family bed does come to pass...and it is bittersweet.

It does suck with the schedule doesn't allow for exercise. Can you maybe sign up both those little buggers for swim class at the same time? And while they are in class you could take a quick swim?

I really love your blog!

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