Sunday, May 31, 2009

Candy Has Never Tasted So Tart

I read something that boggled my mind. Candy Spelling on some radio talk show said that her husband, Aaron, producer of such megahits as Dynasty and Melrose Place probably died of a broken heart because daughter Tori was estranged. I am not a follower of the sudser that is Spelling, however I find this type of public pronouncement unsavory. It certainly does not show her in a pretty pink light.  

Not to get all Dr. Phil on you Candy, however if you want to get back into your daughter's good graces, I'm pretty sure this is NOT the way to do it. I have not heard that you are a stupid woman, so the armchair conclusions I draw from your actions are that you want to keep your fifteen minutes going a little bit longer, you want nothing more to do with your daughter or you're hurt and are acting out.  Pathetic.

I have a friend who is fighting for her life. Daily she endures a battery of tests. She has chemo once a week and deals with the fallout the rest of the time. She is one of the bravest women I have personally known. Each step of the way she takes mental stock of her situation, perhaps a deep breath or two, and then continues. Her courage and will to fight are poetic in scope.

Last night, I performed in a staged reading, in which I played Harvey Milk. Harvey...another warrior.  He'd stare the enemy in the eye and wouldn't back down. He upheld his beliefs, daily going into the trenches.  He even faced the possibility of assassination, knowing the cause was more important than his singular life.  Once again, poetic.

We all possess some degree of heroism...

...and yet, there are those of us who insist that we are more wounded than..., haven't been heard as loud as..., are the tragic victims of..., thus we feel we can do no better than lash out.  On live radio, no less!!

Dr. Mommy says, Stop your squawking! Lick your wounds or forget the slight, and make amends. Because life is precious, and feuds and misunderstandings are petty and do not show you in a pretty pink light at all. Take my advice. Be the parent, the mentor, the good friend. Be big and take the first step.

8 comments:

quinn cummings said...

Your writing thrills me, it just does.

(And my word verification is "No men." Thought you'd want to know.)

Vodka Mom said...

I am clapping right now. clap. clap. clap.



you are amazing.

Ellie Great said...

Amazing!

Out-Numbered said...

Right on brother! Although Tori and I are Facebook friends. Let me know if you want me to say something... Thanks for the comments on Out-Numbered. I missed you man. :-)

Keely said...

Hear ye, hear ye.

Some people, however, are just whiners. They subscribed to the "soggy cookie" theory early on and never got over it. It's just easier to cut them out of your life when they aren't given the 'celebrity' spotlight.

surprised mom said...

What can I say except you are absolutely right. Too many hold onto the hurt, real or not, just to make themselves look like a martyr. What's the point?

Ribbon said...

yes, stupid is still very popular all around the world.

best wishes
ribbon

MichaƩle said...

Bravo. Just found your blog through Quinn Cummings. LOVE IT.